Executions in 2018: min. 690 plus 'thousands' in China

Kenneth M.

At age nineteen, I was arrested and charged with 2 counts of 1st degree murder. A crime that since the 1st day of my arrest, I proclaimed no involvement. For 15 years, I've been appealing my case, fighting for a new trial. Fifteen years with little to no progress due to bad lawyering and constant court error. From the moment of my conviction, I knew that this would be a  long uphill battle, and truly it has been. I was very naive at the start of all this. And I truly believed in my heart that things would work out naturally. Foolish thinking indeed. I was totally unaware of capital punishment and its insidious history. And since then, my views have changed. Waiting for the justice system to come to its senses would be like waiting for the toothfairy. It's just that ridiculous! The only way to truly get the system to recognize its faults is through battle ... Nothing less. Who am I? It would be very easy to list a long batch of qualities. But instead I'd rather do something different, and list the traits I'm not so proud of - the ones I'd like to change. First off: Criticism. Accepting criticism ( whenever it is given ) has always been a challenge for me. Because my initial instinct when being criticized is always to defend first - listen last. Of course it also depends on who it is - where the criticism is coming from. Though all and all, even if the critic is right - it takes a while to sink in. Not proud of it! I guess the next thing would be 'taking orders'. People who think that they are better than you. People who think that they have the right to tell you what you can and cannot do. In most cases I am able to grit my teeth and bear. Though whatever the circumstances - it is always nerving. And last but not least: Stubbornness! Didn't even realize until a friend pointed it out to me. Of course I challenged it at first. Though when I thought about it later on, I realized he was right. And if I ever wanted to progress, become a better human being, somehow - someway - I would have to work to change that. To change ones way of thinking overnight is virtually impossible. And though I have managed to make positive adjustments - it's a constant work in progress. Furthermore ... I am bad with math, have trouble remembering names and, I sometimes find humor in things that I shouldn't. Hey! I'm human! Overall, when writing this - I wanted to present a form of realism that now-a-days can't be found. And hopefully, whoever the reader? could walk away feeling a sense of camaraderie. Because no matter how you slice it, after reading this, there should be no question as to what I offer ... Pureness, fearless, personal dialogue. I do not have a long list of request for anyone to meet but, I do have one. And that one is 'realism'. I am looking for real people. Someone with a brain and a pulse that can think on their own. Someone of creative nature who can formulate their own 'ideas' without regurgitating societal spam. If you're out there ... I'd love to hear from you.

 

If you want to write this inmate, please send an e-mail to sekretariat@initiative-gegen-die-todesstrafe.de and ask for his address.

 

Last update: February 2014